The Trump in All of Us

9 10 2016

donald-trump-caricature-flickr-cc

I have had fun at Donald Trump’s expense over the past couple days tweeting about his most recent developments. He has seemed to be immune from any consequence linked to his self-centered arrogance, until now. I have been waiting for this moment like a little puppy waiting for his owner to get home. Sadly.

Without getting into a political battle, (I am an Independent voter for those who care), this is not about anything against the Republican party. In fact, if there is anything positive about the whole debacle that is Donald J. Trump for over the past year or so, it is the humility of so many Republicans who have showed integrity and authenticity over blind faith to a man who does not represent their values or those of their party, at least as they interpret it.

Make no bones about it, the man disgusts me – even before full proof of just how Donald J. Trump behaves and thinks became so apparent with the latest release of video and audio tapes. He represents everything that creates hate, insecurity and fear… and yet, isn’t there a little bit of Trump in all of us?

Personally speaking, I am not talking about his personal outcome of his hate, insecurity and fear – racism, sexism, arrogance, pathos – but rather the root causes themselves.

Currently, the national (global) discourse around Trump is whether he is fit to be president and whether his temperament should matter to this endeavor. This conversation will get stale soon and we may all be missing a larger opportunity to recognize the Trump in ourselves and investigate what it really means.

Trump is the quintessential example of what it means to react versus respond, and boy, does he react. I cannot speak for anyone else, but it would be a misrepresentation for me to say that I have never been there myself. Let’s be clear – it’s not about how he reacts, just the fact that he is reacting versus more thoughtfully responding in the first place. Isn’t this an initial “go-to” place for a lot of us when under attack (or perceived attack)?

I like to think that a big difference between myself (and hopefully all of us) and Trump is at least we can recognize it, hopefully before it happens, perhaps as it is happening and at worst, after the fact so we can apologize – sincerely versus a Trump apology which is more like reading an adverse event warning on a prescription bottle.

To me, the dangerous, scary and honest concern about Trump is not so much that he is mired in so much hate and arrogance or even how he exhibits it (though that is all incredibly troubling, particularly for someone who, at least up to now, seemed to have a decent chance of being the leader of the free world), but rather the complete, utter and stoic denial that he exhibits in taking accountability for his actions, never even really acknowledging it without throwing someone else under the bus.

The lesson for me is that, as ashamed as I am to admit it, there is a little Trump in me that shows up every now and then – like when I get another letter from a divorce attorney or someone is tailgating me on the road while the kids are in the car, to name a couple examples. However, I’m aware of it. This is a significant nuance – one that, thankfully, does not make me Donald Trump. The current Republican nominee is completely non-aware, and that is what makes him Donald Trump. And in my book, that’s a big difference.

Until next time,

Marc





Heckling His Way to the Presidency

9 03 2016
trump

This man could actually be the leader of the free world. I think we can remove the word “free”.

I have not met one person who supports Donald Trump, not one. Which seems unlikely given the fact that the more vitriol and hate he spews into the system, the more popular he gets. Yet, he is where he is in this circus of an election process.

I am all for difference of opinion. In fact, I have a healthy respect for people who support other Republican candidates, even though I don’t, because at least there is some sort of reason other than “he is saying what I feel”. I actually think Ted Cruz is a lot more damaging should he ever get near the Oval Office, given his views on so many issues that are important to anyone who isn’t male, white, heterosexual and Christian, but at least I know what he stands for and he’s on message.

So, I have been really struggling with how Donald Trump could even get this far based on an agenda of pure hatred with absolutely no substance and seemingly innocuous to the very real protests of people even within his own party. I have come to the conclusion that it is because he is the loudest heckler in the worst comedy club in the city.

Let me explain. I don’t know of a single comedian who hasn’t had to deal with a heckler at some point in his or her career. When you are lucky enough to be in a really professional, well-run, and respectable club or venue, usually it will be clear that it just will not be tolerated for long (if the comedian even gets to the point where he/she hasn’t nipped it in the bud already). At that point, the owner, manager, hell, even the other patrons will shut down the heckler.

However, unfortunately, in many venues where the comics are left to their own devices and there seem to be no standards or guidelines regarding expectations of how things are going to be run, what is and isn’t acceptable, etc. – the louder the heckler, the more attention he gets. Even when the comedian destroys the heckler, the audience will remember the heckling that took place and that is the strategy of the Trump campaign. 

Donald Trump is the heckler in every piece of crap basement that bills themselves as a “comedy club” and specializes in an onslaught of blow job jokes and cheap vodka. And he loves every minute of it because he is an attention hound and has systematically gone to every show with a weak headliner and feature act. First it was Jeb Bush and now it’s Ted Cruz and Marco Rubio. He doesn’t even have to worry about Kasich because Kasich won’t even play. He knows no amount of backlash can outdo his heckling skills.

Furthermore, Trump knows that since he can’t truly compete at the classy clubs (think those with actual content, intellect and rules), he will gain all his attention by annihilating social norms that others require and make his own and he does it by being an equal opportunity offender, or heckler in this case.

This is where the heckler has an unfair advantage because hecklers do not need to address the subject matter at hand. I was once talking about cougars and someone called me an asshole. It had nothing to do with my set. I mean, I could almost understand if they didn’t think I was funny or they lost a loved one to a vicious cougar attack but this guy just didn’t like me. Period. That’s how hecklers work.

Donald Trump can’t actually respond to anyone with anything of substance so he goes after their sweating, their birth place, their spouses, their looks, their religion, their nationality, their gender, their handicap, whatever. Anything is fair game and it grabs the attention of everyone, whether they agree or not. Everyone is talking about Trump the same way everyone talks about the asshole who heckled during the show.

The problem is that this heckler isn’t going home to nurse a hangover and beat up his dog (or maybe he is) but he is also dangerously too close to being the leader of the free world and applying junior high school playground tactics on the world stage thatmay have all of us asking for a refund sooner rather than later.

Until next time,

Marc





Matt Damon, Race and the Anal Probe

19 09 2015
NEW YORK, NY - FEBRUARY 04: Actor Matt Damon attends

The Devil is in the Damon.

There was an apology followed by an enormous cadre of tweets.

That seems to be how it goes these days – if it can’t be said, redacted and commented on in 140 characters of less, you’re SOL.

Except, I come from a long line of talkers – real talkers. We can’t say hello in 140 characters. That’s where this blog post comes in.

For those of you who may not have seen the story – it pretty much goes like this: Project Greenlight, an HBO film project led by Damon, himself, and fellow bromancer, Ben Affleck, was the culprit this time. Damon apparently was caught “whitesplaining” (no, I am not making that up) the concept of diversity to a successful black woman producer (as if her success should have anything to do with it).

The guy apologized. I don’t know Matt Damon and I could be wrong, but he seems like the kind of dude I’d like to hang out with – not Affleck or Clooney, who also seem to make up his posse, but definitely Damon.

Here is where things get sticky for me, personally. 

In comedy, no one seems to care what race you are – they really don’t. Basically, it’s about being funny and even aside from that, being an “outsider”. I am so far from Hollywood that I can’t even think of a metaphor to describe it but what if, hypothetically speaking, you would like to have more friends or understanding of a community you are not part of? It’s not that easy. Take my word for it.

We have lots of discussions about race and I think I’m pretty much as open-minded and liberal as they get. That being said, I know that it is hard to establish deep ties with communities that you are not part of. It’s just the truth. 

Damon apologized and said he was grateful that it opened up a greater dialogue about diversity, blah, blah, blah. To me, the point is – are we looking for examples of exclusion or opportunities for inclusion? This is what I love about the comedy community. I have never, ever experienced that sort or inclusion, regardless of race, sex or creed anywhere else – not college, not work and certainly not in suburbia. 

It is a black thing -I can’t understand. Just like it’s a divorce thing, or a Jewish thing etc. But maybe we could all understand more if we didn’t allow this narrative of diversity to miss the point. We won’t be able to eradicate racism, sexism, or any “ism” if we automatically assume mal-intent. In other words, can we give somebody the benefit of the doubt? Ignorance is curable, if the participant is willing. 

I do a joke about being divorced and if you are not, it’s sort of like getting kidnapped by aliens and getting the anal probe. It sounds bad – really bad. It’s scary. But unless you’ve actually experienced it, well, you get the point.

In our conversation about racism, can we all get to the point where we move beyond assuming people can’t understand to the point where maybe they can at least empathize? Empathy goes a long way and sometimes I think we don’t take a long, hard look at what we are doing to keep others out – conservatives, liberals, socialists and others, alike.

I’m not sure this post makes sense or not. I guess what I am saying is that if you really are “open-minded” and want a community based on ideas, beliefs and positivity, then a good starting point would be to start to walk others into understanding what you have declared is not possible simply because they happen not to be born or raised in a particular way.

Makes sense to me. Though, truth be told, I think it’s a comic thing – you wouldn’t understand.

Until next time,

Marc

Thanks again for reading. I appreciate it. If you haven’t already, please consider enrolling to get my blog posts delivered straight to your inbox through this site, email me at marckaye91@gmail.com or follow me on Twitter @marckaye1. (Better yet, how about all 3). Also, through October 15, for every new follower I get, I will be donating $1 to Nechama, a disaster relief agency, in honor of my daughter who is raising money and awareness for this great organization for her Bat Mitzvah project! Thanks again, Marc








%d bloggers like this: